How to Fix Recruitment

Listen to our SNCOs!

Conor Daly signs autographs prior to the running of the 2019 Indy 500 race. Daly was sponsored by the Air Force and has been making multiple appearance representing the Air Force in the months leading up to the race. (Air Force photo/Master Sgt. Chance Babin)

I love officers. They’re my favorite people. Yes, I know. I was an officer. As my favorite CMSgt (Heathermoore Silva) used to say, “Occifers and your heavy books.”

Fair enough.

And that’s the thing about occifers, commanders, colonels, general officers, and the rest of us — we’re all just humans. In most cases, the difference is just a silly piece of paper from, in many cases, an online program. That’s not a knock against ALL online schools. Still, I think it’s safe to say that an American Military University degree shouldn’t determine who commands our national treasure — America’s sons and daughters.

This is all a very long wind-up (baseball metaphor, Afghans) for me to say that the first step in fixing our recruitment problem is to . . . wait for it.. .

Listen to our Senior Enlisted Leaders who’ve been saying the same thing for nearly a decade!

Don’t believe me!

I’m sure you didn’t snooze your way through our AMAZING political leaders (a few exceptions, of course) bloviating about whatever. Suffice it to say that it’s basically the same thing: our enlisted are underpaid, they’re asked to do too much, and their families suffer under a staggering amount of bureaucratic incompetence.

Suppose we cannot take care of our troops and their families. Why should we expect their families to continue to sacrifice for this country when they can’t even get affordable childcare, find effective mental health treatment, or even a freakn’ moving company that doesn’t destroy all your stuff and then give you a receipt for you to call to get a small % of your furniture’s damage.

And whomever did this little thang, G*d bless you.

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Toxic Leadership

Here’s another problem these exemplary Senior Enlisted Leaders didn’t discuss: toxic leadership (cough, cough, occifers). And that’s not the job of SELs—at least not in front of Congress. They’re more apt to tell that to those four-star GOs that roam the earth like modern-day Caesars interrupting the affairs of every Ambassador across the globe when they take their monthly trips to all the—wink, wink—” hot spots.”

I go hard at General Officers—and you know why? We should! They volunteered for that job, and G*d bless them for it.

Who has two thumbs and wouldn’t want that job for all the money in the world and the greatest dank this side of the Mississippi?

A Tired and Fucking Exhausted Grumpy Combat Veteran Turning Down Becoming a General Officer

While I would disagree with Trump on his decision to fire specific general officers, I think it’s high time SOMEONE get fired for losing two wars. Sure, Iraq has turned out “better” than Afghanistan, which we surrendered to Al Qaeda, and is somewhat ruled by a democratic government that teeters on the precipice of civil war at the drop of a hat, but yes, yes, yes, we won.

Standard question for those saying we won the Iraq War:

“Are you planning your next summer vacation in Kurdistan? Because I hear it’s quite lovely this time of year.”

Sorry, where was I? Oh yes, recruitment!

Part of the reason you’re not going to get much sway with playing the violin for these general officers is because people don’t care what they have to say.

Sure, the people who read the New York Times, The Atlantic, The Bulwark, The Washington Post, and the Wall Street Journal might find it an interesting plot turn. Still, for the Americans that I often hang out with across this grand country of ours, I get two reactions when I bring up Trump firing “the generals”:

1. Blank Stare: Huh? TikTok, baby! Or whatever the latest app has sucked their brain into that horrible contraption we call the “Smart Phone” - Neil Postman and Technopoly, eat your heart out.

2. Fuck ‘Em: I heard from my uncles and second cousin that the military sucks because (fill in the blank)

   1. Toxic leaders

   2. Fucking Afghanistan

   c. Fucking Iraq

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Why so Much Toxic Leadership?

U.S. Navy Adm. Christopher W. Grady, Vice Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, speaks with Reserve Officers’ Training Corps (ROTC) cadets during a mentoring session at the University of Notre Dame in South Bend Ind., Nov. 8, 2024. The University of Notre Dame offers three ROTC programs: Army, Navy/Marine, and Air Force. (DOD Photo by Tech. Sgt. Tinese R. Treadwell)

Anyone who has served knows there’s a staggering level of toxicity in the officer corps. It’s not that the Os come in being assholes, though there are always exceptions. Instead, it’s the utter insanity of our operations tempo combined with a careerist mentality that runs rampant.

My biggest operational accomplishment in my four years in command: killing at least three missions that were a total fucking waste of money and resources. Yep. These missions were being held tight by some 2 star who didn’t want to let go of his precious even though it was redundant.

Pete Hegseth can do one million push-ups with the troopies, but if he’s not going to address the staggering amounts of toxicity inside the officer corps, then don’t expect recruitment to hold steady. Sure, holding general officers accountable for their mistakes is important, but until we start holding them accountable as field grade officers, then don’t expect anything to change.