Hope's Corner

A generation of women were left behind, but Helai roars loudly for all of them

One of my life’s scary events 

Hey there! Again, it’s me, Helai.  In this text, I would like to tell one of the scariest events of my life, something which not only shocked me but my family also,  in Afghanistan, where we live, it has been a horrible story for young girls for many decades and still is on an increasing scale.  forcing a young girl to be responsible for a big duty, erasing a girl’s dreams, writing a tough and challenging life story instead, replacing all her choices for life with an old man that she even does not know him, simple “ forced marriages”.

It looks like a simple word, but the one who has experienced it knows what a huge fear and pain is behind that. And I wholeheartedly feel sad for my sister, who was really near to experienced it . The root of this evil action started from the first regime of Taliban in Afghanistan and is still continuing.  I don’t want to remember those days, those trembling,  those fears again, but I want to show others what’s going on in Afghanistan: a place that is a prison for women. It was a nice spring day everything was going in the usual manner, we were sitting together in our house and laughing at something that I don’t clearly remember. 

Then suddenly the door knocked, and my little sister went and opened the door–there were two strange women were standing there. At first glance, no one of us could understand what tough days they will bring on us. As our usual culture, we welcomed the women, and they came in, by serving them a cup of tea with cookies, they started talking, they were talking about their lives, and my mom asked them why and how did they come to our house. The words that they said shocked my mom, they said: we are proposing your young daughter to our son. My mom said she is still 18, and she is planning to study so we kindly tell you not to repeat this again, but no, they said: do you know who is my son? He is Talib and he liked your girl. You have to give her to us; my mom was afraid but still trying to show no fear. 

They continued my son is in contact with high positions of government, and if you don’t give your girl, they will jail or even assassinate you all. 

They said this and left our house. Everything stayed silent for a while then my mom started crying,  she said everything to my father, he was trembling with fear; it was the first time I saw my parents like that. 

Oh! 

My sister, she was not aware of anything yet. She entered the home, she was coming from school. She was happy and asked what happened, and why you are sad. My mom was shocked and stayed silent. She only said death is better than marrying a Talib who is 48 years old. 

One day passed, and again, our door knocked.  After that event, anytime our door was knocked,  everyone’s faces were covered with fear. Two scary and harsh men with long beards and disordered appearances, asked “is your father in home?” 

They came in while they were carrying their rifles,  fear, fear, and again fear we didn’t know what to do. My sister was crying and urging me to please hide me somewhere I am afraid,  my mom was crying and yelling that your father! They will do something bad to your father. I was the one who lost herself and her way, all I could do was try to make my sister stop crying.  I felt that I couldn’t do anything.

After three hours, which passed like three centuries on us, my father entered the house. His eyes were full of tears, but he was trying not to cry and stay normal so that my sister wouldn’t get afraid anymore. 

He said, “Don’t worry, I will find a way.” 

That night, I am sure no one of us could sleep. 

The morning all of us were sitting and having our breakfast when my father said to my sister, “I know you are young, you don’t want to marry,  you want to study, but my daughter, we have no way for your safety and our safety,” he said.

“This way is better than marrying an old man and marrying a Talib, who already has a wife. My father said we should do it as soon as possible. 

My sister was wiping tears. She said, “I can’t tolerate my life being ruined in front of my eyes!”

 She was crying and was saying, “my goals, my dreams, my wishes.” 

 After a while, she talked to my mom and said that she agreed to marry the son of my father’s friend. It was highly scary and horrible, and I think I can’t explain it by words. Not only my sister, but more than a hundred Afghan girls become the victims of these scary marriages. I have seen many of our relatives who got married with old men. Or some of them skipped and then the Taliban found her and killed her. It’s very tough, very tough. I hope that one day,I will be able to change this all and punish all of the people who ruined a young girl's life.

That’s how my 18-year-old sister is now married to a very busy family with many responsibilities and chores. 

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Helai Murshjid is an Afghan girl living in Afghanistan.